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King Henry V: Act 5 Scene 1
- [Enter Chorus]
- Vouchsafe to those that have not read the story,
- That I may prompt them: and of such as have,
- I humbly pray them to admit the excuse
- Of time, of numbers and due course of things,
- Which cannot in their huge and proper life
- Be here presented. Now we bear the king
- Toward Calais: grant him there; there seen,
- Heave him away upon your winged thoughts
- Athwart the sea. Behold, the English beach
- Pales in the flood with men, with wives and boys,
- Whose shouts and claps out-voice the deep mouth'd sea,
- Which like a mighty whiffler 'fore the king
- Seems to prepare his way: so let him land,
- And solemnly see him set on to London.
- So swift a pace hath thought that even now
- You may imagine him upon Blackheath;
- Where that his lords desire him to have borne
- His bruised helmet and his bended sword
- Before him through the city: he forbids it,
- Being free from vainness and self-glorious pride;
- Giving full trophy, signal and ostent
- Quite from himself to God. But now behold,
- In the quick forge and working-house of thought,
- How London doth pour out her citizens!
- The mayor and all his brethren in best sort,
- Like to the senators of the antique Rome,
- With the plebeians swarming at their heels,
- Go forth and fetch their conquering Caesar in:
- As, by a lower but loving likelihood,
- Were now the general of our gracious empress,
- As in good time he may, from Ireland coming,
- Bringing rebellion broached on his sword,
- How many would the peaceful city quit,
- To welcome him! much more, and much more cause,
- Did they this Harry. Now in London place him;
- As yet the lamentation of the French
- Invites the King of England's stay at home;
- The emperor's coming in behalf of France,
- To order peace between them; and omit
- All the occurrences, whatever chanced,
- Till Harry's back-return again to France:
- There must we bring him; and myself have play'd
- The interim, by remembering you 'tis past.
- Then brook abridgment, and your eyes advance,
- After your thoughts, straight back again to France.
Scene I France. The English camp.
- [Enter FLUELLEN and GOWER]
- Nay, that's right; but why wear you your leek today?
- Saint Davy's day is past.
- There is occasions and causes why and wherefore in
- all things: I will tell you, asse my friend,
- Captain Gower: the rascally, scald, beggarly,
- lousy, pragging knave, Pistol, which you and
- yourself and all the world know to be no petter
- than a fellow, look you now, of no merits, he is
- come to me and prings me pread and salt yesterday,
- look you, and bid me eat my leek: it was in place
- where I could not breed no contention with him; but
- I will be so bold as to wear it in my cap till I see
- him once again, and then I will tell him a little
- piece of my desires.
- [Enter PISTOL]
- Why, here he comes, swelling like a turkey-cock.
- 'Tis no matter for his swellings nor his
- turkey-cocks. God pless you, Aunchient Pistol! you
- scurvy, lousy knave, God pless you!
- Ha! art thou bedlam? dost thou thirst, base Trojan,
- To have me fold up Parca's fatal web?
- Hence! I am qualmish at the smell of leek.
- I peseech you heartily, scurvy, lousy knave, at my
- desires, and my requests, and my petitions, to eat,
- look you, this leek: because, look you, you do not
- love it, nor your affections and your appetites and
- your digestions doo's not agree with it, I would
- desire you to eat it.
- Not for Cadwallader and all his goats.
- There is one goat for you.
- [Strikes him]
- Will you be so good, scauld knave, as eat it?
- Base Trojan, thou shalt die.
- You say very true, scauld knave, when God's will is:
- I will desire you to live in the mean time, and eat
- your victuals: come, there is sauce for it.
- [Strikes him]
- You called me yesterday mountain-squire; but I will
- make you to-day a squire of low degree. I pray you,
- fall to: if you can mock a leek, you can eat a leek.
- Enough, captain: you have astonished him.
- I say, I will make him eat some part of my leek, or
- I will peat his pate four days. Bite, I pray you; it
- is good for your green wound and your ploody coxcomb.
- Must I bite?
- Yes, certainly, and out of doubt and out of question
- too, and ambiguities.
- By this leek, I will most horribly revenge: I eat
- and eat, I swear--
- Eat, I pray you: will you have some more sauce to
- your leek? there is not enough leek to swear by.
- Quiet thy cudgel; thou dost see I eat.
- Much good do you, scauld knave, heartily. Nay, pray
- you, throw none away; the skin is good for your
- broken coxcomb. When you take occasions to see leeks
- hereafter, I pray you, mock at 'em; that is all.
- Ay, leeks is good: hold you, there is a groat to
- heal your pate.
- Me a groat!
- Yes, verily and in truth, you shall take it; or I
- have another leek in my pocket, which you shall eat.
- I take thy groat in earnest of revenge.
- If I owe you any thing, I will pay you in cudgels:
- you shall be a woodmonger, and buy nothing of me but
- cudgels. God b' wi' you, and keep you, and heal your pate.
- All hell shall stir for this.
- Go, go; you are a counterfeit cowardly knave. Will
- you mock at an ancient tradition, begun upon an
- honourable respect, and worn as a memorable trophy of
- predeceased valour and dare not avouch in your deeds
- any of your words? I have seen you gleeking and
- galling at this gentleman twice or thrice. You
- thought, because he could not speak English in the
- native garb, he could not therefore handle an
- English cudgel: you find it otherwise; and
- henceforth let a Welsh correction teach you a good
- English condition. Fare ye well.
- Doth Fortune play the huswife with me now?
- News have I, that my Nell is dead i' the spital
- Of malady of France;
- And there my rendezvous is quite cut off.
- Old I do wax; and from my weary limbs
- Honour is cudgelled. Well, bawd I'll turn,
- And something lean to cutpurse of quick hand.
- To England will I steal, and there I'll steal:
- And patches will I get unto these cudgell'd scars,
- And swear I got them in the Gallia wars.